Moms Blogging.com is having a Meanest Mom Contest. It ends on October 31st. Think you quilify? Well, if you are a mother, chances are, yes. I think we all have those moments of overiding our normal, easy going demeanors when children try our patience. I am certain that we all hear that we are a "mean mom" from our children at multiple times in their life. Fortunately as my daughter gets older, I hear this comment less from her. But our children are quite capable of causing parents great guilt with this heart stabbing comment.
My most recent encounter was last spring. My daughter was using all her college expense money (that I provided) to go on shopping sprees and frequent dining out. This child has never wanted for anything. And also had an, "all you can eat" college dining plan. Her extravagance irked me in the fact that is surpassed my spending! Prior to this, her spending was prudent and well controlled. So why the sudden change?
Her comment on this? Well, you are... putting me through college and I needed something to do in my spare time.... (Yup, it was boredom.) Besides, mom always let her spend what she needed. (Oh no, I created a monster.)
The way she said it was one of entitlement. It was just one of those moments when a parent is shocked by their childs unexpected actions. So, in a fit of fury, I lost all control. And threatened to shut off all expenses. That is when I became a mean mom.
So was I a really mean mom? It depends on how you define mean. If rabid foaming of the mouth and bared fangs count, then yup I was "it'. But I think I was a mean mom more because I threatened an action that I would never follow through on. I am certain that my daughter knew this. And that I was being cruel just out of anger.
Anyways, she never did spend like that again.
3 comments:
Yeah, I remember spending like there was no tomorrow in college and I only WISH that my father handled it the way that you did... you seem much much nicer. :)
Thanks for playing!
"But I think I was a mean mom more because I threatened an action that I would never follow through on." Interesting thought! Personally, I think you were right on in the action you threatened and I'm glad to hear your daughter's behavior changed.
A friend of mine told me about a plaque she and her sisters got for their mom. The poem on it was all about the mean things their mom did as they were growing up and it was saying, Thank you!
Maybe someday our kids will get something like that for us! *grin*
Thanx for the sweet comment heather. :)
Irritable mother, I guess you can tell that I still feel a bit guilty about the way I handled that. I likely would have gotten the same results without stressing my daughter out. It was cruel.
Considering that my daughter has always been a wonderful child. Well behaved, good grades, very friendly. What more could a mother ask for?
Sometimes I felt like I spolied her, money wise. I used to allow her to take money from an envelope whenever she needed it. All she had to do was write it down so I could keep track. But now I realize that I only gave her that benefit since I could trust her.
I guess that is why her "overboard" month in college shocked me so much. But we are all human and make mistakes. :)
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